Last week I wrote from a thought after reading …to always try just “one more time” and immediately- it was all wrong for me. I missed out on the most important points so I will do this “one more time” for me- and for you.
I really have ditched the word “try” from my vocabulary. My antenna goes up when I hear someone say “I will try to be there…” Or “I will try not to do that again.” It is a word that is already saying ‘NO’ without actually saying it. A set up. An excuse, like “well I said I would only try.” When I have used try with an invite- I actually forget all about the actual event the moment I say try. If I really wanted to go I would check my calendar or say yes right away. ‘Try’ means it’s not that important to me, reminding me of the Principle “we all act in our own best interests” and this wasn’t in mine.
Do you “try” to get to work on time? Do you try to pick up the kids from school on time? Do you try to eat healthy? How about trying to get enough exercise! What are you really saying when you do not commit to the action?
Some of us were over committed as kids – you know the sports teams, school, social activities, etc. Maybe we had too much chaos at home so a sense of over-responsibility to everything. I did the babysitting of 4 younger siblings with my brother as well as we cooked, cleaned and felt like slaves with lots of responsibility and no pay. I think this may have caused us to be wary of committing to things that may even be great for us but are just one more thing on our to-do list.
How about not wanting to hurt other people’s feelings by saying “no”. Your actions may be saying their feelings are more important than being true to your own. I have done that, for sure! Hmmm…how did that happen? Lots of reasons on the how and why but do we want to continue this behavior? Has it ever occurred to you that you do not have to make excuses or justify your “No”? Did you know that it is more than okay to say “No” politely?
“No.” is a complete sentence! By eliminating “try” from your everyday language you change how you feel about yourself. Do it (Don’t even think to just try!) for the next week and see how many times you catch yourself saying ‘try’. See if you can restate the statement that you used it in an affirmative way.” Yes.”, “No.”, “I will considerer it.” or “I don’t know and will get back to you.” then do so. You will feel empowered, really! Let me know how that works for you.
If you are stuck in the “trying” of life, contact me and I will give you a free laser coaching session so that you can kick that “trying” habit!